Searching for Vivienne

Now that our crowdfunding campaign is over, it’s time for the next step: finding our cast. Below is a prayer to the goddesses of casting.

—Sue Lange/producer, Le Bon Chef

It’s time to cast our lead Vivienne
We hope to find a star and then
Funding for the film will quickly grow.
We need that money, so let’s go!

We’ll scour the banks of Hollywood nation,
Forging ahead with some trepidation.
Will our leading lady like our work?
What if she’s a diva and acts like a jerk?

Who’s available, and who won’t vomit
When they consider our meagre budget?

Can Nancy Travis deliver a joke?
Does Toni Collette look good in a toque?

Take a look at Joan Cusack.
Maybe Meg Ryan wants to come back.

Parker Posey? Lucille Ball?
Is Geena Davis a tad too tall?

Is Polly Walker at all available?
Is a deal with Cher on the table?

Is Emily Watson still on top?
Is Debra Winger still that hot?

Is Julie White a Starmeter Queen?
Who’s the one driving the scene?

Laurie Metcalf, Sarah Paulson
Laura Linney,  Connie Nielson
Frances O’Connor, Gina McKee,
And don’t forget Jennifer Jason Leigh.

This casting process gives me a kick,
But I hope it goes kind of quick.
The parade of stars, three people deep,
Keeps me from getting a good night’s sleep.

So casting agents, return my call
But let’s forget about Lucille Ball.
There are others we can think of instead
And I’m pretty sure that Lucy is dead.

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